the following will be just random thoughts, with no transitions in between, if they make sense at all anyway.
So with this past weekend being my first free one in weeks, I've come to realize that I shouldn't complain about being busy too much, because I realized that if I don't have anything to do, I really will do n o t h i n g. And I mean absolutely nothing in that I get pissed at myself for being so unproductive. Can't even get a head start on things, take some photos, study a bit, brainstorm some ideas, exercise, read a book, etc.
Though, I guess I do enjoy being able to do small things like catching up with my three fashion blogs, The Sartorialist especially, searching for apartments though I can't act any time soon, and the more recent activity of doing some things on Mechanical Turk!
In these past.. months or so, few things have changed; things aren't much different. I feel I've outgrown some things, some people, though. I am not missing Facebook. When I think I about it I really despise the meaningless jabber and narcissistic photo whoring that seemed to become the site (not to mention that wretched, wretched re-design). Four hundred plus friends is just a numbers game because I really care for maybe 10, if that. I think of how quasi-useful Facebook may be with the people I'm meeting on set, but I think if they really want to get in contact with me, they will find other, more substantial ways of getting in touch with me, am I right? It's not going horribly so far, I suppose. I've been good for the month+ I've been off. Maybe it will be permanent, maybe not.
I was reading this short article/blog or other about some guy who eliminated all of his social networking sites and reduced his company to contacting him the actual human way. He noted that, with the elimination of the networking sites, people cut out all the fluff and useless chatter and got straight to the point.
A lot of what I feel sometimes is this feeling that I'm not where or what I should be. I'm entering my final year at Columbia and beginning the core of the advanced cinematography courses and yet I feel that I am far unprepared to be "advanced." I feel like I'm late. My time is running out.
And I feel I am definitely drifting away from people I used to otherwise hang with often, think of highly. We've evolved into different things and different people but I haven't really found new things or people myself. I believe I'm just as antisocial and hermitic as before.
I don't want to say that I'm really complaining about these things, though. They're merely observations in my eyes. Points to note. Cus I know, everyone knows, I'm the only possible agent of change.
I just think I need a change of pace right now, something new.
I at least want to take this down, so I can look at it in the future (and weep).
O_O Never again! CRAZY good price.
But alas. I guess I'll see what the summer holds for me otherwise. It's usually nothing much at all but there may be some plans in the works to spend July 4th in some other city. We'll see I guess.
I think I've rambled enough and I'm sleepy now.
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